Introductions...

Just wanted to introduce myself. My name is Michelle, and my husband of a year and a half is B. We've actually been together for almost 10 years, so that "year and a half" thing doesn't really do us justice. We both turn 30 this year, a milestone year. And of course, turning 30 makes you start thinking about having a family, as your time "may be running out". This thought occured to us last year, and we started "trying".

Being an overachiever, I found TTC websites and message boards, and discovered charting early on. And since I never really thought about how things were working "down there", I also bought ovulation predictor kits, just to be sure everything was OK. Which it was (or so it seemed). The first month of trying we hit paydirt, a positive! Of course, our excitement was short lived, as I developed a nasty wisdom tooth infection, and got my period about 3 days late. I figured, well bad timing, it must have been the infection! So I made an appt and got those buggers removed the next week.

We continued trying, not even missing a beat, and what do you know, I started spotting a few days before my period was supposed to arrive the next cycle. Weird...I tested and it was negative. I began to worry (Google "abnormal vaginal bleeding" to see why) as the spotting continued. Two days into it the test turned positive! Whew! I wasn't dying of some dread disease, it was implantation bleeding! Right! No, wrong. The spotting never stopped. I made (my first ever!) appt at the OB, and begged for beta tests. For an ultrasound. For anything! She told me to relax, many people bleed early on, everything was probably fine. And she congratulated me, and sent me on my way, despite my tears and frustration. Two days later (at about 4 weeks, 5 days) I started passing huge clots. My sister, Dr. C, told me to high tail it to an ER. I did, and they confirmed that my hCG was only 24.7, that it was way too low if my dates were correct, that I was miscarrying.

Well, it was sad, but we were OK. I was so nervous with all the bleeding, about the health of that baby, that it was actually a bit relieving at the time. I figured it was too soon after the other miscarriage, that it was poor implantation! Nothing to worry too much about. So we waited a cycle, and started trying again.

Fast forward 6 months. Six months of perfectly timed sex. Charted and OPK'd and confirmed ovulations. Of course my cycles start getting a bit weird, a bit longer, but I always ovulate, and my period always arrives on time. Nothing. We get worried, and I schedule an appt at the fertility clinic about a week before my period is due. But then, surprise! Positive a few days later. And this time, no spotting! I was so happy, so relieved! I just barely squeaked by getting pregnant before my first due date, which I had naively thought would be a reasonable goal. But we did it! I told my sister (the only person we've confided in about this) and we were ecstatic. I cancelled the fertility clinic appt, and made a new OB appt. They wouldn't see me until 8 weeks since there was no bleeding this time. I begged for an earlier appt, for beta tests, and again they ignored my pleas. But maybe it was OK, I would try to be a "normal" preggo this time.

Well, at about 5 weeks, again, I began spotting. Dr. C rushed me in for an ultrasound, where everything "looked normal", but there was no sac. This could have been normal, but wasn't. The bleeding increased, and I miscarried again.

So, the OB has told me to keep my appt. But it won't be a happy initial pregnancy visit, it will be the beginning of fertility testing. Stay tuned, I have a feeling this ride is just getting started.